Rep. Rashida Tlaib’s Kids, Heroes, Dabbed on the Floor of Congress

Let me tell you something, no matter how many times I see someone dabbing, no matter how many times I read the Wikipedia page that is trying desperately to explain dabbing to me, no matter how many times a younger cousin attempts to teach me to dab, I will never, under any circumstances, get it. Never! I will, however, always enjoy a strategically placed dab, like a physical non sequitur upon which I gaze with bemused glee. “I just don’t know what this is,” I mutter, “but I like it.”

Such was the case during C-Span’s broadcast of the swearing in of the 116th Congress. During the role call for Speaker of the House, newly elected Representative Rashida Tlaib stood to deliver her vote for Nancy Pelosi and was accompanied by her two young children who proceeded to dab on ’em. What a confusing delight! What is dabbening?

Tlaib, who represents Michigan and is one of the first two Muslim women to serve in Congress, was sworn in on a copy of the Quran opened by Thomas Jefferson. In terms of solemn procedural moves, that’s a dab all on its own and I am awed. The actual dabs of her kids later in the day are icing on the cake.

Let’s take a second to appreciate their different dabbing styles. The younger kid goes for a less showy dab, with straight arms and a tucked head like an Olympic figure skater in a spin. The older child is giving us a full jazz hands dab, with one arm reaching sky-high like a chorus member in Chicago. It’s a stunning study in contrasts and one of the best things that has happened in Congress since the last time Maxine Waters spoke.

The Tlaib kids’ expression of joy (is that what dabbing means? Sure! I don’t know!) is also a stark contrast to a similar moment in Congress last January when Kansas Rep. Roger Marshall’s son attempted a dab during his swearing in but was stopped by notoriously unlikeable former Speaker Paul Ryan.

It really is a tale of two dabs. One year ago, universally reviled, slightly hot but spineless villain Paul Ryan mistakes a dab for a sneeze and is promptly yabba dabba boo’d out of office. A year later, Nancy Pelosi returns as Speaker, children around the world spontaneously break out in angular arm dances. I’m just saying, it’s not a coincidence.

Indeed, maybe it’s actually all part of the process. I’m not very well-versed on my Congressional rulebook, but I think it’s totally plausible that the framers dictated all votes be confirmed by a viral dance move, otherwise they are not official. This all tracks. I mean, that’s got to be the reason that a video of Alexandria Ocascio-Cortez recreating the dance from The Breakfast Club is suddenly going viral. Surely that’s it. It would be totally weird for conservative trolls to dredge up a fun video that actually makes her look even more fun-loving and appealing from her college days to try to discredit her today. That can’t be it. Must be the parliamentary procedure.

So, on the first day of the 116th Congress, we have one side that is literally dancing and another side that is the dad from Footloose. Sounds like America. ::dabs::

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